Five Years
by zoe-and-luna
Summary: After five years, she's finally brave enough to say what she's always wanted to say. But will he feel the same way? Zutara! Sozin's Comet spoilers
1. Five Years

Five Years

It's been five years.

Five years since the Aang destroyed Fire Lord Ozai.

Five years since the war ended.

Five years since we all worked together to save the world.

Five years since I realized I loved him.

Five years since he went back to his girlfriend.

Five years since he broke my heart.

I've waited long enough. I've done too much for other people. It's time for me to go after what I want. And nothing is going to stop me.

Initiative

Just because the war was over did not mean that there was peace in the world. There were a lot of bitter feelings towards the fire nation and a lot of fire nationals who were not inclined to their new Fire Lords way of running things. So, in an attempt to keep order, Aang teamed with members of the White Lotus Society and brought people from every nation to the Western Air Temple. It was our headquarters. The Avatars most trusted friends acted as liaisons between him and the spokespersons of any town that had a grievance. They listened to everything the people had to say and reported it to Aang. Then he would do his best to grant the townspeople things that they needed to survive. It is a daunting task and often filled with a lot of woe and anger when the Avatar couldn't grant a request.

However it wasn't all business. Once every other month, Aang invited the leaders of the largest cities in the world to get updates on all the provinces. Bumi, The Earth King, Toph, Suki and, of course, Fire Lord Zuko were all about to descend upon the Western Air Temple for one such meeting. The first day of which is reserved for social visits. We have a large party and catch up on our personal lives. And when he comes up and asks me how I'm doing (as he always does) I'm going to tell him that I'm in love. And hopefully he'll ask with whom, and then I'll tell him, "With you Zuko."


	2. Five Years Ago

Five Years Ago

Five Years Ago

I'm not sure when I started liking him. It could have been in the catacombs under Ba Sing Se, but his betrayal may have silenced the feelings at the time. It could have been when he went with Sokka to rescue my father from the boiling rock, but the intense joy of that reunion may have over shadowed any inkling of affection towards him. Or maybe it was when we went in search of someone from his past, and ran into someone from mine. Whenever it actually happened doesn't really matter. All that matters is what happened after I realized it.

We had left the Ember Island Theatre with mixed feelings. We all loved our trip down memory lane (some of us more than others) but it also served to put our current situation under a microscope. The comet was going to be upon us the next day and none of us were as ready as we had hoped to be. I also had the added bonus of being incredibly uncomfortable around Zuko and Aang. For some reason, sitting next to Zuko in that dark theatre watching our lives unfold, I realized how far he had come. How much he had grown. How my feelings for him had grown into something more than indifference. They were actually far from indifferent. I liked him and I had no way of telling him. Not only would it distract him from his task (teaching Aang firebending) but I could only assume that he would try and avoid me at all costs and we couldn't risk alienating one another this close to the comets arrival.

So many things happened before the comet arrived. Aang went missing and we had to fly all over the place to try and find him. We ended up back at Ba Sing Se because of a tip we received from Jun the bounty hunter. There was no trace of Aang anywhere and the only person we could think of to help us was Zukos uncle. The meeting was more beneficial than we had originally planned. We met the members of the White Lotus Society which included Iroh, Pakku, and King Bumi. It was like a family reunion. However it was cut short by the task at hand.

Iroh suggested a battle plan which included all of us splitting up. At first it seemed as though Zuko was going to try and take down his sister on his own, but in a surprise move he asked if I wanted to join him. And I did. I wanted to go and make sure that Azula was taken down. She had been causing us problems for so long, she had ruined the invasion plan, she nearly killed Aang, and there were so many things that she did to Zuko. I wanted to be there when she was defeated. Upon reflection, I realize that I also wanted to be with him when he did it. No matter what she had done to him, she was still his sister and I knew it was going to be hard for him. I wanted to be there in case he fell apart. I wanted to heal him and I thought maybe I would be able to tell him my feelings.

The fight with Azula was unexpected, to say the least. She was completely off her rocker and you could see it in the way she was fighting. By contrast, Zuko was at the top of his game. Every move she made was easily countered by him and he knew he was wining. Of course, he did what all big brothers do and began teasing her. I understood why he did it. He was finally beating her and there was no way she could deny it. He was rubbing it in a little and, truth be told, Azula deserved it a little. Bust she wasn't done yet. She had a couple of tricks up her sleeves.

I don't really remember what happened. It all went so fast. I remember Zuko teasing Azula about lightening (I think he wanted to show her how well he could redirect it, or maybe really literally serve her some of her own medicine) and then her laughing and turning on me. Then I saw a familiar blue crackle form around her, then blackness. Then I heard Zuko cry out and something fall to the ground. I opened my eyes and there he was, on the ground in front of me, smoke billowing off of him. I wanted to heal him, but Azula came after me, so I had to deal with her first. It was a fairly quick battle. There were some pipes running underneath the square we were fighting in, I was pissed, and she was worn down from her fight with Zuko.

Reviving him was tough work. I had to concentrate but I was on the verge of a breakdown. How could I ever forgive myself if he died because of me? What would I say to his Uncle? What would I say to anyone? I wasn't sure I was going to be able to do it but then he coughed and started breathing again. I was so happy. I hugged him so tight that I'm sure I almost killed him again, but he didn't seem to mind. He wanted to jump into battle with Sokka, Suki, and Toph but I convinced him that we should stay where we were, at least for a while, so he could heal. It was an awkward period of time. We sat there in silence. He was probably thinking about our friends in battle and how Aang was faring against Ozai. I was thinking of how I was going to tell him that I liked him. The other stuff was on my mind too, of course, but at the time telling him was all I could think about. Then he ruined everything.

"Do you want to know what I'm going to do when all this is over?" He looked up at me from where he was laying and adjusted himself so that he was now on his side facing me.

"Go back to Ember Island and see Love Amongst the Dragons?" He chuckled and then moved so he was sitting up right facing me.

"Yeah, seeing a show is at the top of my to-do list. It was right after "defeat sister" and just before "taking the throne". How did you know?"

"I'm a good guesser. So…what were you really planning on doing." I don't really know what I thought he was going to say. Some part of my mind imagined Zuko telling me that he was going to go to Aang and tell him that he liked me. Apologize to Aang and hope that they could still remain friends. Another part of my mind thought that Zuko was going to tell me all about his plans for rebuilding the Fire Nations and its ties with the rest of the world. I completely didn't expect for him to say what he did.

"I'm going to go to the Boiling Rock and have Mai and Ty Lee released. Then I'm going to apologize to Mai for everything I've done and ask that she take me back. Do you think she would, after everything that has happened to her because of me? Do you think she would even consider dating me again?" I looked away from him. I had thought that I liked him and I thought that maybe he liked me. But after what he said I realized that I had stronger feelings for him and that he had none for me. Or maybe his lack of feelings just made mine seem all the more intense. Either way, there was only one girl on Zuko's mind.

"Oh, I don't know. How many girls would turn down the Fire Lord?" My attempt to turn it into a joke wasn't going to work. Zuko still had some self esteem issues so right after the words came out of my mouth I wanted to take them back. Take the look of hurt and confusion off of his face.

"I don't think that Mai would say yes just because I would be the Fire Lord. I mean, I wouldn't want her to anyway. I'd want her to take me back for me. Not because of some stupid title."

"Zuko, I didn't mean it that way. Of course she wouldn't just say yes because you're the Fire Lord. If she feels as strongly for you as you do for her, than I'm sure that she won't hesitate. I know I wouldn't. I mean, not that you would ask me out or anything, but if I felt a certain way about someone and then they did something and then they apologized for it…then…then I would…She, I mean, she would take you back. You know it's been a while. How are you feeling? It's probably best if we get up and get going now. We need to see how the others are."

And that was pretty much it for us. Aang defeated Ozai and soon there after Zuko was heading for the Boiling Rock, alone, to retrieve his girlfriend. A small part of me wished that she wouldn't take him back. I knew that Zuko would have been torn apart about it but I would have been there to help him get over her. Unfortunately, she took him back with gusto. Everyone was so happy for them, so I had to pretend to be happy for them as well. It was sickening. I did, however, take comfort in knowing that Zuko was happy. Not much comfort, but it was there. I tried to move on with my life, but I also tried to keep an eye on Zuko and Mai to see if there was any trouble brewing. I hit my lowest point a few months after Sozin's comet arrived. We all gathered for a huge party before we went our separate ways. We were meeting at Iroh's tea shop and everyone had come and we were all talking about our lives. It was so much fun, until my mind started playing tricks on me.

I could have sworn that Zuko was trying to flirt with me from across the room. Every time I looked at him, he was looking at me. At the time, I thought the look was something more than it really was. A young girls mind sometimes runs away with her, you know? So, I kept glancing his way, every other second it seemed. Finally, Mai was dragged outside by Ty-Lee so she could show Mai some new tricks she learned with her fans. I practically ran over to Zuko, thinking it was our only chance to talk. He met me about half way across the room, grabbed me by my wrist and pulled me into the kitchen. No one even noticed us leave! It was going to be perfect. We went into the little office behind the kitchen and Zuko closed the door.

"Okay, it wont be long before someone notices we're gone, but I had to tell you something." My knees were weak. I had always hoped he would say it first, hoped that I could play a little hard to get, then tell him I felt the same way. It was going to be just as I pictured it.

"Aang still has a huge crush on you." Except it wasn't how I pictured it at all. He wasn't supposed to talk about Aang at a time like this. Who talks about the Avatar when they're confessing their love to the girl of their dreams? But, of course, he wasn't confessing anything to me. He was just helping out a friend.

"Excuse me?"

"He'd kill me if he knew that I was talking to you about this, but he's not really sure what to do anymore. He said that he's made his feelings clear to you, but you still haven't really responded either way. He just wants to know where he stands Katara. He deserves that much, doesn't he?"

"What business is it of yours Zuko? Maybe I haven't said anything to Aang because I don't know about my feelings yet! Maybe I need to make my own feelings clear to my self before I respond to other people's clear feelings about me…so…so…just stay out of it." I tried to push past him to leave the office, but he blocked the door.

"Hey, I'm sorry. I guess I just wasn't thinking. I just thought that you've spent so much time with him that you would know what you felt. I mean, with me and Mai, there was just no question. Even after everything I did." I don't know if he was actually trying to make me sick or if he was just good at saying the right things.

"Well, I guess we all can't have it as easy as you and Mai." He actually started day dreaming. He got this dopey look on his face and started daydreaming about the girl who he's already dating. He really was trying to make me sick.

But then I saw it. Really saw it. All his feelings for her were in that look and they were the same feelings that I had for him. And it was the worst. I knew that he was happy and I was almost happy because he was happy. So, of course, my eyes started to well up. I turned away from him hoping that he wouldn't notice.

"Hey, I'm sorry I didn't mean to upset you. Please don't cry." I wiped my eyes and composed myself.

"Don't apologize. It wasn't your fault. I just realized something and the tears started falling. I'm fine." I didn't know what else to do so I just hugged him. I doubt that he knew what was going on, but after a couple of seconds he hugged me back.

We stayed that way for about a minute incomplete silence. Then I realized that we should be getting back out to the party before anyone noticed us missing. I pulled away from him and wiped my eyes again.

"Okay, let's get back out there before anyone starts missing us."

"You sure you're okay? I could leave and you could stay back here for a while."

"No, I'm fine, but maybe you should go first. It might look weird if we walk out of the back together. Go on, I'll be out in a minute." He nodded and left the room and I started trying to compose myself. Not only did Zuko have a girlfriend he was crazy about, but he was pretty much trying to hook me up with someone else, which basically meant that he really didn't have any feelings for me. Of course, somewhere in the back of my mind I knew this but, to have it expressed in person hurt more than I thought it would. But now wasn't the time to be upset. It was a party and I was expected to be apart of it. So I left the office and rejoined everyone in the main tea room.

The first thing I saw when I walked into the room was Zuko kissing Mai and since I didn't want to throw up in front of everyone, I walked outside. Aang was on the patio staring out at Ba Sing Se, he turned around and smiled at me and I did the stupidest thing I've ever done in my life.

I kissed him.


End file.
